Here's To...

I've actually got so much to say..so much I wish people would hear, people would understand, people would listen to. But I sit infront of this screen and nothing comes out. I haven't the slightest clue where to start. I mean I had every intention on getting my story out, but now I can't find it. Does that mean that it really just doesn't matter any more? Like I went through it, I survived it...and that's it..no more? Who cares? Because latley that's how I've been feeling. I used to want everyone to know why the heck I am the way I am..because it's been questioned before..but now...I'm just like..ugh..I let it go..it's over and done with and as long as the people who it involved don't come around then I really don't care to live by it.

I'd love to be able to say I'm starting over, but as my experiences have told me..there's no such thing. I mean...is there? Ugh...what everrrr...here's to starting somewhere different...here's to forgetting the past to my best ability...here's to being optamistic

Grey's Anatomy

Last night I was watching the second season of Grey's anatomy on my laptop..which by the way, if you're one of those people that can't stand watching movies on a small screen such as the 14" laptop I've got..you'd hate my life..I don't have a tv..haha.. Anywhoo...I was watching the episode with the train colision. That one brings tears to my eyes no matter how many times I watch it. I mean gosh, it starts off with poor Meredith getting stood up..well...ok...she waits for like seven hours...ok..less..but I obviously don't have the real time, I just know she was there forever. Anyway..she's waiting there for McDreamy to show up and sweep her away. Does he show? Of course not, because he supposedly doesn't want to give up his old life in one day. If you ask me, that was a crappy excuse..I mean he moved from New York to Seattle..so obviously he was getting away..he ignored all her calls..forgot all about them and started over with his new life and Meredith..never mentioning being married...so yeahhhh he was giving up his life..what's the differenc now? So..Meredith gets paged because of the train incident..and misses him coming in. He shows up bout 20 mins after she leaves..figures. So after that quite depressing situation there's Donny..the girl who was stuck with the pole going through her and the other man..yes "through"...she was on one of those cute blonds you just have to take care of..you know? Like..easy to love..cracks jokes to cheer you up..and you laugh because she's trying so hard..not because the joks was funny..well...you see..it came down to her and the man stuck on the pole with her. Either she died, or he did. Of course as fate would have it she died..before they took her off the pole she asked if her boyfriend was there yet. No. So told McDreamy to tell him when he showed up..."If love were enough, I'd still be here with him". Well..bring on the tears...they pull her off...and she's all crashing and what not..and Meredith's there with her hand in the wound yelling out "You can't just abandon her..you can't just leave her"..which obviously we can tell is how she's feeling about McDreamy...so anywayyy...in the end..McDreamy stays with Addy..and Meredith goes about her depressed workaholic life and I play the next episode....gosh...what a soap!

Totally cool...I found this while searching Google..for ideas..

I found my way to the BCC library..where I do most of my blogging, because there I can bring my lap top and connect to the web. I sat at the center table and I was adding quotes to the pictures on my side bar when I felt a tap on my right shoulder.

"Help...please...me"

Great..broken English

"Um sure, what do you need?"

Make it quick I'm blogging here

"Eh..eh..I think I'm doing this"

Huh?

"This book, I'm supposed to do"

Great..foreign retard..

"Well, what page are you supposed to be working from?"

"Um..um..eeehhh..this one.."

pg 253

"Ok, well it has six steps for you to do, just follow them"

"What do I do?"

Your'e kidding me right?

"Well, step one says to go to the desktop and open paint"

"How does paint open?"

"Click on it"....."Twice"....."No, fast"...."Like this"

"I opened paint?"

Well...technically I did..but whatever

"Ok, what does step two tell you to do?"

"Um..um..draw.....a....circle....in center...of page"

"Ok, so now you just have to draw a circle"

"Which one's the cirlce?"

The round one stooge

"This one, above the square"

"I click on it?"

YEESSSSSSS!!

"Yup, and you have to draw it in the center of the screen"

"Am I done?"

"How many steps have you completed?"

"Two"

"And how many are there in total?"

"Um..eh..six?"

Finding my happy place...Peanut butter ice cream

"Yup, so now go onto step three..what does it tell you?"

"Um..choose a color....and.....fill...in the cirle"

Ok, easy enough

"What color?"

"It doesn't matter, whatever color you prefer"

"Um..um..ok..choose a color....and.....fill...in the circle..I choose color now?"

"Yeah, just pick a color"

"Ok"

Waiting for color selection

"Choose a color...and...fill in the circle"

"Look, just click on one of these colors down here, you see them?"

"Yes...you pick"

"Ok, we'll go with blue..what does step four say?"

"Eh...um..step four....click on Text button....and write your name in the center of the cirlce"

"Ok, the text button is the one with the big "T""

"Big "T"?"

"Yeah..this one..click on it"

"Ok, I clicked, now what?"

"What did the book tell you to do?"

"Um..my name"

If you ask me what your name is I'm walking away

"Ok, good, now what..what's the next step?

"Um..eh...go to file...go down...to save as...save to the desktop"
This one will be fun

"Ok, file is in the top tool bar"

"File...ok...save it? I save it?"

"Yup, save it"

"As what?"

"Anything you want"

"Um..ok...um...go to file...go down...to save as.."

"Just save it as your name"

"Ok...now what?"

"I'll bring it to the desktop for you"

"Oh, thank you"

"The last step..what does it tell you?"

"Exit paint and go to desktop and....bring it to...the recycling bin"

"Let me do that one for you"

Now, I swear to you this woman was not mentally challenged in any way..she just barely spoke English and didn't know a thing about computers.

Stimulating Conversation

The text that began my day at 8:07 am

"Vet tech full or part time 1227 Ashley Bld. Apply in person"

"Oh, ok thank you =-)"

"You gonna go"

"I'll check it out...but a position like that is taken by someone trying to get into the vet stuff..n a tech is like n intern..ill look at it"

"It said tech-assistant"

"Yeah..techs n tech-assistants would b in school training..lab work..appointments..ill check it out tho..c if they need kennel ppl"

"Just go you never know"

"Yeah i will...thank u =-)"

"Good girl"